Thursday 5 October 2017

Don't Cast a Doubt Till May's Out

Just seen the video of my sermon yesterday at the Druids' Conference on Education.

Yeah, I know I said that the United Reformed Church is a front organisation for the KGB. And that Julian Assange is actually an avatar of Gary Numan. Neither of which is true. Nor is Husborne Crawley overrun by separatist mice with Boris Johnson faces.

But I'd got a bit of a cold. So I'd taken Vics Vapour Rub, Fisherman's Friends, Lemsip, Victory Vs and quite a lot of whisky. Which meant I stayed on track like Donald Trump at a rally. But at least I didn't cough.  On the contrary - my vocal cords were that relaxed I sounded like a bass who's been on testosterone.

Really unfortunate, the letters falling off the backdrop as well. It was supposed to say "Upskilling the Masses." Which I didn't think was great. But it was definitely better than "Up killing the  asses."

1 comment :

  1. The good things about unfortunate sermons, they provide fruit for future teaching to undo the damage done.

    And you can always plead sporadic insanity, which has now been cured by a stay in the Celebrity, Priory Clinic and off course you plant to treat it as a Sabbatical and the parish can pick up the bill.

    Always a way to renew and restore credibility.

    ReplyDelete

Drop a thoughtful pebble in the comments bowl